I've heard Richard Blakeway and David Lunts deliver the same speech twice in two days, and I'm still left in the same state of bafflement.
At both the EG London Development Conference yesterday and the NLA Delivering Homes for London conference today, which I've just got back from, Blakeway spoke about bringing in space standards.
I know, I know.
Boris has been going on about "Homes for Hobbits" since he arrived on the City Hall scene without much happening. I was at a press conference last July when he first enthusiastically declared that he would make private developers build bigger homes. Afterwards, his press team frantically scurried about correcting journalists that actually, it was only affordable homes which would have to conform to space standards. In fact, they already do have to comply with space standards. So, nothing new after all.
But, in this speech I could probably recite to you by now, Blakeway said that they were going to introduce Parker Morris Plus 10% as the basic standard. (Parker Morris standards are based on the recommendation made to government 47 years ago that a one-bedroom flat should be at least 490 sq ft, a two-bedroom flat 623 sq ft and a three-bedroom semi 792 sq ft.)
This could represent a massive increase, and prevent a lot of the rabbit-hutch building of recent years - I live in a very small flat, and the possibility of spreading out a bit has obvious appeals - as long as the costs aren't passed on to the hard-done-by buyer.
But when pressed later on at the conference, it turns out that in fact this only applies to affordable housing once again - the Mayor's office and the HCA seem to get surprisingly free-market when it comes to the moral right to impose space standards on private developers. And in fact, Parker Morris plus 10% standards is what the now-redundant English Partnerships had previously enforced anyway.
However, there was more hope this time for those campaigning for bigger homes.
Blakeway was adamant today when he said that although he could only apply these rules to affordable housing without changing the London Plan, they would be "creative and uncompromising" about the way that definition was applied.
So, no homes that are on public land, receive public funding, or are in any sort of joint venture with the HCA or public bodies, will be eligible for that cash unless they meet Parker Morris plus ten standards.
A big ask for hard-pressed developers, and a scary one in a world where many housebuilders are forced to go cap in hand to the public sector in a way they could never have foreseen at the time of planning.
A prediction for you. All developers adopt Parker Morris +10%, and even exceed it. They score brownie points, win grant funding and are showered with plaudits. Government pats itself on the back for a job well done.
Then, reminiscent of the 'habitable room' game, following practical completion, and 'sold' as purchaser options, the developer starts putting in extra stud walls - turning that incredibly spacious 1-bed in to a tight but lettable 2-bed. No planning consent needed of course.
Everybody is happy. Apart from those tenants perhaps.